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Life Beyond Therapy

Are you Type A, B, C or D?

Posted: February 17th, 2017 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy Haven’t you heard people say, “Oh, I’m such a Type A personality” or “You’re such a Type B person”? High-achieving folks often brag how Type A they are: “Oh, I can’t help it, I’m such a workaholic.” And Type Bs like to remind you how mellow they are. But did you know that there are also Types C and D personalities?

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How to forgive

Posted: February 3rd, 2017 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy Just in time for Valentine’s Day, that day when many of us remember the men and women who hurt us, broke our hearts or “done us wrong,” I offer you some ideas on how to forgive those who have hurt you. I was inspired to write this after reading Colin Tipping’s terrific book, “Radical Forgiveness.” I’d like to share with you my version of forgiveness, which although is inspired […]

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January is ‘divorce month’

Posted: January 20th, 2017 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy I didn’t make this up. I was reading a professional journal and this was mentioned in an article on counseling couples. They didn’t explain why, so I did a little research of my own to see if they just put this in the article to get my attention or if there really is some truth to it.

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Real change

Posted: January 6th, 2017 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel

Every year, around this time, clients ask me: How can I make this new year better? How can I make real changes in my life? How can I be less stressed out? Less lonely? Make more money?

I can’t promise answers to all your desires, but I’d like to use this column to suggest how you can make changes that really last, leaving maladaptive old habits behind.

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A numb new year?

Posted: December 23rd, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

Life Beyond Therapy | Michael Kimmel Why do we numb ourselves? What is it we don’t want to feel? Is it so bad to “take the edge off”? Of course not, but how do you get there? Do you need something external (drugs, alcohol, sex, shopping) to make you feel better, or is there a way to get there on your own?

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All I want for Christmas is the perfect relationship

Posted: December 9th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy As Christmas nears, many of my single clients want Santa to bring them the “perfect relationship” and leave it under the tree (nicely wrapped, of course). As a psychotherapist, I am happy to play cupid, but I insist on being a cupid based in reality. In this column, I’ll include questions you can ask yourself to increase the likelihood of finding that perfect woman/man under your Christmas tree.

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Feeling Safe

Posted: November 15th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy This is not the column I expected to write this week. I did not expect to awaken with dread the morning after the recent election. I didn’t want to get out of bed. I didn’t want to face a world where Donald Trump was the president-elect. I was scared of what would happen. I didn’t feel safe.

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Calling fear by its name

Posted: November 11th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy A key ingredient of a happy life is how you handle fear. Fear is inevitable — it’s a part of life — so what are we going to do with our fear? Most of us are neither encouraged to identify our fears nor are we encouraged to ask for help in working with them.

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Why I’m an optimist

Posted: October 28th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy You might think with so much ugliness, cruelty and fear in the world, that optimism would be foolish or naïve. Nope. The ugliness has always been there, but now, it’s all out there for everyone to see it. These days, the ugliness is coming out of the closet.

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The PTSD experience

Posted: October 14th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

Life Beyond Therapy | Michael Kimmel In the world of psychology, PTSD — post-traumatic stress disorder — is how doctors describe the experience of recovering from trauma. Created in 1980, the term was used to describe soldiers coming back from war: These men and women had often killed people and watched their friends die. Extremely traumatic, right? I would like to posit a slightly different definition of PTSD.

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Can you be happy for someone else?

Posted: September 30th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy There’s a word in Buddhism, “muditā,” which means “celebrating the success of others.” The first time I heard it, at a meditation retreat in Northern California, I wondered, “Why is the teacher talking about this? What does this have to do with feeling calm and peaceful?”

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The ABCs of couples counseling

Posted: September 2nd, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy Over the years, many people have asked me a lot of questions about couples counseling. For this column, I’ve boiled those questions down to three, which I call the ABCs of couples counseling: A: What can couples counseling do for my partner and I (the possibilities)? B: What should we expect (the content)? C: When is the best time to start (the timing)?

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Burned out at work?

Posted: August 19th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy I see a lot of clients who have problems with their jobs. They tell me they feel burned out at work. I define this kind of burnout as job-related mental and physical exhaustion that has a negative effect on your personal life. Here are some signs you may be approaching (or experiencing) burnout:

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