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Life Beyond Therapy

The ABCs of couples counseling

Posted: September 2nd, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy Over the years, many people have asked me a lot of questions about couples counseling. For this column, I’ve boiled those questions down to three, which I call the ABCs of couples counseling: A: What can couples counseling do for my partner and I (the possibilities)? B: What should we expect (the content)? C: When is the best time to start (the timing)?

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Burned out at work?

Posted: August 19th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy I see a lot of clients who have problems with their jobs. They tell me they feel burned out at work. I define this kind of burnout as job-related mental and physical exhaustion that has a negative effect on your personal life. Here are some signs you may be approaching (or experiencing) burnout:

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The imposter syndrome

Posted: August 5th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy When you were a little kid, didn’t you look at all the hard-working grownups all around you and think, “Wow, they’re so good. I hope I can be like them some day.” And then, as an adult, you look around you and think, “Wow, we’re all just faking it. None of us are really that good.”

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Don’t lose yourself in a relationship

Posted: July 22nd, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy Often, when I counsel newly-married couples, I hear a familiar lament: “I feel like I’ve lost myself since I got married” or “After moving in with my partner, I feel like I’ve merged with them so much that I don’t know who I am anymore.” You fall in love. You move in. You get married. You get lost.

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Beneath anger, there is sadness

Posted: June 24th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy In 1995, when I was a middle school counselor in San Francisco, I was asked to facilitate an anger management group for the most out-of-control boys in the school. Most of the boys in this group were in trouble with the law; they stole cars, belonged to gangs, carried guns … you know, they were just the kind of people I usually hung out with. One of the main […]

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How to grieve in wake of Orlando tragedy

Posted: June 14th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy As the tragedy in Orlando continues to unfold, I find myself asking: How do you grieve for someone you don’t know? How do you grieve when the situation keeps changing? How do you grieve when it’s all so confusing? I have written this column to answer these questions and to offer you some suggestions on what to do with your grief.

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Go to the mirror

Posted: June 10th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy Mirror work is something I first tried about 30 years ago. I went to a workshop in West Hollywood where author and teacher Louise Hay encouraged people to talk to themselves in the mirror. I thought it was pretty weird and resisted it, at first; but today, I frequently use it in my counseling practice and in my personal life.

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How to be popular

Posted: May 13th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy There are hundreds of books and videos on how to be popular. In this column, I’d like to talk about some of the personality characteristics I’ve noticed over the years in clients, friends and colleagues who were particularly loved and cherished.

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‘The Untethered soul’

Posted: April 15th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | 2 Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy Have you ever wondered, “How can I become less reactive and impulsive?” or “How can I turn down the noisy voice(s) in my head and experience more peace of mind?” Michael A. Singer’s book “The Untethered Soul” answers questions like these.

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How to handle disappointment

Posted: April 1st, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy What do you do when you are disappointed? How do you handle it? That’s what this column is about. Recently, I experienced a surprising disappointment. I had contacted the mayor’s office, asking for assistance with a city-related problem and did not receive the help I’d asked for. My phone calls and emails were not returned and I was not treated well (in my opinion).

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The joys – and sorrows – of dating apps

Posted: March 18th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy I am the first to admit that I have used dating apps: I even met one of my boyfriends on one (no, I’m not telling you which one). Some apps are more for dating and romance (OkCupid; Plenty of Fish) and others tend to be hookup-oriented (Grindr; Scruff). If an app requires a face pic, it’s usually more relationship-oriented. If body part shots are prominent, it’s probably more about […]

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Retire, but don’t quit

Posted: March 4th, 2016 | Columns, Featured, Life Beyond Therapy | No Comments

By Michael Kimmel | Life Beyond Therapy I am turning 63 in June, and am being increasingly asked by friends: “When are you going to retire?” It’s a fair question, since AARP started sending me membership cards 13 years ago. In my case, I don’t want to retire because I really like the work I do: Having a private practice, doing workshops, and writing books and newspaper columns is (mostly) fun for me, so why would I […]

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